Nevermind that.

Well, I dint get the job at tgv, but nevermind that! :) Opportunities lies everywhere, you just have to keep searching. When the times is right, you'll get the job. But for the time being. I got time to relax, and take a chill pill. 

Abah said, we're going to mustafa today, finally I can buy some things to pampered myself. HEHE :D

say that again? woah!

Okay, since i'll be movin' a bit late kan. Most probably i'll be searching for a job in tebrau city, and the thing is, STARBUCKS IS ALREADY FULL! Full of what? Full of shit! I want the freaking job man! Hopefully there still a place for me in bukit indah :) And tomorrow, I got a job interview at TGV cinema. Since I have tons of mate working there, I guess that would be awesome. Insyaallah, if it'll turn out alright, I can have the job :)

Okay, why?

Okay, its been a week since my last post, so many things already pass this week. Okay, the girl that we called 'jerawat' is actually nadiah zaidi, at first I thought it was only a crush, but then only I realize, it was more than a crush.

Anyway, enough with her, i've moved on, and already clear things with her, there's a million reason why I want her, one of it is because of her awkward smile. But she'll always be my special one ;) Anyway, last thursday, shafiq lah, izzul, zul affkarl and I lepak together, and we had one in a lifetime experience when izzul drove around the lake. Something, 'supernatural' occur! Well, I love them so much! HAHA! Its been fun! Oh, one more thing, abah said we'll be moving a little bit late, so..

 I GOT TIMES WITH MY MATES :D

Again, from yesterday.

The story goes like this, that afternoon, we head to hany's aunt wedding in tiram. So after a while there, we head to today's mall, just for the sake of never been there. Anyway, after all that, at approximately 5 something, I head to her house, in the car was afiq, reena, shafiq lah and me. They cheer for me, as I drove the car. The thing is, about her, we've been talking about her since july I guess, and at first it was just a simple crush, but later on, I feel, there's something different about her. I mean, she's the type of girl, that you won't see in your everyday life. There's something about her, that, yet to be discovered. And omg, her awkwardness, is just a major attraction for me. She's not the type of girl, that you easily get her going, but once you attached to it, oh my, its definitely the most wonderful feeling in the world :) Anyway, back to what happen. So, I asked reena to call her, and she asked if we can park the car, away abit from her house. And as I drove the car, the tnb building witness everything. From my rearview mirror, I can see her walking slowly towards the car, I man up myself, to walk out from the car. When she came near me, and asked what's up, I explain, but the thing is, I never told her what I should have.

 Because I already knew, what she's gonna say. I wish I did tell her what is buried deep inside me, I wish I have another chance to confronted you, to tell you what I SHOULD HAVE. I wish I had more time. I WISH THINGS WERE DIFFERENT FOR ME :\

hm.

Hm, I confessed. But, I dint tell her what I should have. And the result, maybe I should continue this on tomorrow. I don't feel to well. And here's a picture of what I did after 'that'.

yeah, I was wearing a baju melayu that time. I need a coffee after that. I'll tell you here, what I should have said, but the words, isn't coming out from my mouth. Tomorrow okay?

the dream.

My facebook, is totally fucked up, I don't even wanna talk about it. Oh, last night, I dreamt about going to my last day of school :(

 As I can remember, it all started in the class of 5PA2. I was at my usual sit in that class, I was busy chatting with syafiq and ayie, then we later head to reena and wan's table to have our daily chat. Later on that dream, we head to the canteen, but I stop, and waited for nadiah on that dream, yeah, she was there to. And we walk together with hany and nana. Over at the canteen, on that dream, I ate my usual menu, and enjoyed my moment with them. And the weird thing about that dream, after I had finish eating, I hug each and every one of them, as if I knew, that would be the last time i'll ate with them in the school. As I woke up, I stare at the clock, and start to remember, every little detail about my school life, and how much I miss em :(

wowo!

Two days back, that is on tuesday, I head to tebrau city with nana baker, hakim, wan, and era rahman :) We were job hunting, I mean they. I don't have to look here, since i'm moving kan? BUT THE THING IS, when we were lepaking at starbucks, and we saw..

Tada! The Australian army! I even took a goddamn picture with them! Fuck off uh nak malu, its a one in a lifetime experience. Co accidentally they were having their monthly training in PULADA, so they dropped by at jusco just to chill ;)

what happen among us.

Well, izzul is working for his parents. Shafiq is working at black canyon by tomorrow, and.. uh. I don't wanna talk about it, its fucked up. Im moving, and everybody's is freaking busy :'\

Love struck, Romeo.

Had three days at ampang hilir, that practically open my mind abit. Rather then staying here without nothing else to do, plus the fact that I got my driving class tomorrow. HAAISH, I HATE YOU STUPID DRIVING INSTRUCTOR. 

Mixed Up.

I don't know how to define anymore. Just mixed up feelings.

Uniforms.

tomorrow, is my officially last day, of school. And tomorrow, will be my last day, that i'll be wearing my school uniform. What do I feel about it? Pretty sad, of course laaaaaaaa. I mean, 10 years of schooling, end just like that.

 I still remember, the first time I walk into the school. Ahh, the memories :')

Oh my bleep.

Green letters, I've made a letters for each of my mates. And inside of em, there's a letter that is personally written by me for them. And inside each of em, there's an item, which have double meaning in all of em :)

I don't know how to define this.

Well yesterday's afternoon, shafiq lah,khateejah,sabiha,amelia,zul affkarl and I, head to BSN to get our UPU number to apply for our college later on. Anyway, from there, we head to tebrau city to just look out for jobs opening here and there. Well for starbucks, they only take 18 and above, but i'll try to slow talk with em later on. And this is the starbucks that i'm trying to work! :-\

 Okay, so I don't know why just now, after I watch how I met your mother, marshall said, 'its time for you to man up'. And from there, I felt like, its time already. 

The truth is coming soon.

The truth is coming soon. I mean, the REAL deal. Who and why, and I mean who is the person, and why I want her. Yep, I REALLY REALLY MEAN IT THIS TIME. Oh yeah, one more thing, SPM DAH HABIS. Not exactly, my last paper is next week that is seni. Anyway, just now at school, I felt sad leaving school. When its time to head back, I shook my mates hand, and I quickly left from there. And from there, I feel my tears gently flows down as I walk swiftly through the school, cause I know, only time will tell if I'll ever see them again. I know, i'm just a small piece of memory inside of their head. Sooner or later, my mates will definitely erase me from my memory. Why only now i'll tell you the truth? ITS NOW OR NEVER. I'm leaving soon enough, so what more can I wish for?

That was quick.

Err, I swear to god, as slow as it is i'm falling for her last time. I don't feel that anymore. I swear to god that feeling tarnish that quick! I don't know why. Maybe, there's a message in your eyes that tell me ''perhaps it was just a waste of time''. So, yeah. Cherrio :D

11th of november 2011 :)

People say, that this date, is magical, and it can grant wishes and ect. And some even say, that when the clock strike at 11:11pm, the magic is three times more powerful. Even though I dont believe all this shit, doesn't hurt if I try ain't it? Well, today, was the last day of school. Even though I got stuck at hospital today, I really really want to drop by at school just to see my mates one last time. And when the clock strikes at 11.50am, I prayed to god so that I reach there at the right time. I reach the school at exactly 12.10pm, and I thanked god for that. I ran towards the surau, and my god, there was some of my friends still there, I quickly hug and shook all the guys. I swear to god, my eyes were watery at that exact moment. I thanked god, for all of that. Today, is the last day of my life, that one feeling when you're stepping in into a school, you'll only get that when your entering a school to study. When we're stepping into the school for spm, is entirely different. So that feeling, i'll miss you. FOR SURE :')

And I say, hey.

She's way out of my league, so I want to delete your number. It's not easy, your not just deleting a number, your deleting a part of your life. It's not easy, trust me. But I did it anyway, and I need some time to clear my heads off. I don't feel too good. This is bullshit, why does every time I follow my instinct about falling in love with a girl, it all lead to this? I don't even wanna know. I gave you everything I got for a little piece of mind. And today, was the last day, was the last day of my life as a school student, cause next week is spm, and after that, I can't call myself a school students, its hard to say goodbye I know. But this is life, I know, there's always a hefty sum of people I wont see anymore in my life. But please oh allah, bless their life with perfection, for I love them deeply very much :')

In a state of confuse.

You're messing with my mind right now. I don't know if I want you, or not. Oh god, I don't like were this is going.

Counting. 1, 2,3 and bleep.

Oh my god, spm is in just one digit day awaaaay. And when I start counting, one, two, three and bleep! I say. Okay, here I am, typing every single words out from hany's laptop, taking a break after eating me chicken ;) Im seriously in a fucked up period mates. Spm is near, and seriously i've been neglecting my books. Looks like, i am gonna leave you for awhile blog :( Don't worry, i'll be back on the 1st of december :) Ohh, about jerawat. Hell yeah i'll wait ;)

such a foodtastic day

today, almost all the malay people in this country gain weight, and is sick of seeing dead cow everywhereee. HAHAHAHAHAHA.

Few more minutes.

In a few more minutes, thousands of malaysian are celebrating hari raya korban. Its a 2nd raya this year, and usually we barely celebrate anything. Since its just a one day occasion, we kids don't even get money for it :P One thing on mind, hanging out with my mates :)

Its a bleep night

Haaaih, I dont get jealous sometimes, I get jealous all the time. That says it all. Trust me, I do get jealous all theee freaking timeeeeeeeeee :(

Its been, fullstop.

Okay, its been so long since my last post. And trust me, I dint have the time to use this trusty laptop, and update my blog. But I can easily surf my tweeter account and facebook account since it can be easily updated using my phone. ANYWAAY. Its been awhile right, so manyy things had happen over this few days, or I should say this period. I mean, as a student kind of way, i've been focusing on my studies lately, c'mon uh, spm is too near. As i'm typing all this down, a song by awie called dipenjara janji is playing. Old school? I KNOOW, hahaha. Okay, next up, the one thing that almost all the people have been asking me, about the girl that me and my buddies codename 'jerawat'. Shitty? I know! So, about her, the thing is, i've been listening and doing as what this proverb tell me too, 'all good things come to he who waits'. And yeah, i've been waiting for the right moment. Probably after spm, since i'm respecting her time, I mean, since spm is just in one week time. I gotta respect that. And I don't even care if she even rejected me. I've got nothing to lose, I need her to know, how much I want her,  and how hard for me to fell in love with a woman. Plus the fact, that i'm moving, at least if she rejected me, she won't see how bad i'll look afterwards. What? Of course im gonna cryyy! The thing is, when I said I want someone so much, I want her badly. 

I don't care how long i'll take for me to have her. The main problem for me is, I don't even stand a chance. I can see that, as if, we're strangers again. As if I don't even know you. So yea, i'm falling in love with a shadow, AGAIN.

two days of gayness.

Yesterday and today, was probably the most crazy day we had ever encountered so far. It all started when nana and hany came to my house to pick me up in nana's sister black myvi.

This is an actual picture that I took from my view .When I enter the car, I asked them, 'mana korang dpt kereta ni?' nana replied, 'aku drive kereta ni dari rumah aku'. I WENT, 'WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!??'. Hany backed her up, so yea, I trust her. Nana drove a car uh! GILAAA SIAA. hahahahahaha. Okay, so after that, we went to a empty stretch of road near the small lake, and hany was going to teach nana how to driveee. So okay, I was terrified of course, nana's driving was GRAZYY! So went izzul sent shafiq dolah to join us menggila inside that myvi, hany drove the car to get some gas. After that, we roll to nadiah's crib to fetch her. And of course, after that. SAMBUNG THE MADNESS. Nana took the wheel, and at first she was okay, nadiah zaidi, shafiq dolah and I were busy chatting behind, when all of a sudden nana turn the car LIKE GRAZY, we were shouting and screaming of course. All nana can do, is freaking laugh. HAHAHA! Okay, so after that we head to my house, to take the GEN2 out. Nana and nadiah head to nana's crib first. Then later joined by hany, shafiq and me with the orange ride. So sepatutnya study, but they all got hungry, so ramai ramai makan pulaaaak -.- Then, izzul texted me, and asked us to fetch him. So we were all excited to drive. Hany, nadiah and I ride the gen2, while nana and shafiq dolah ride the myvi and follow us from behind. Hany was worried if nana couldn't do the busy road that we're gonna cross later. So, she asked her to just go around the lake and head back, while we fetch izzul. And after that, we head to bestari indah, to fetch wan. When we nearing nana's crib, we saw nana's myvi driving toward us, and when we looked at em, SHAFIQ DOLAH WAS FREAKING DRIVING THAT CAR. Anywaaay, when all of us reach nana's crib, we studied for a while, and masa nak balik. I took the wheel of the gen2 to send nadiah back homeee. I was terrified, since I only had drive once. But of course I was 'gelabah', but it was okaay. When all was done, izzul shafiq and I head to my crib, and stayed overnight. That night, we went to kedai abe for dinner. Pretty much we had such a good time that day, at night all of us were tireeed. But that doesn't stop us from watching the hangover and jackass :D ANYWAAY, izzul slept around 12 maybe, and I slept around 3 something. BUT shafiq, he din't really sleep, cause he was carried away with the internet -,- Okay, so the next morning, I mean afternoon, Izzul was the driver, so we head to restoran sayed near jusco to get us some brunch. 

That's how our nasi lemak ayam look like. It was okay, so when we head back, I decided to take the wheel, and drove to just practice. So izzul gotta head back to his house at 1400 hours kot, but that evening, hany and yus came to my house, and I personally asked yus to freaking teach me how to drive. AND OH GOD, I drove the car around pelangi indah, putri wangsa , putri park and freaking dato' chellam! :D It was grazy, hey guys, I'm gonna stop until here, cause I think i'm going into a fever agaain -.-

Im so tired.

Yes, i'm so fucking tired of your absent. Why can't you just be here? Why must it be so fucking hard? Why can't you? Jeez. I don't like the way it is. As if, we're strangers. You on the other hand, sometimes you act as if you don't know me. All this while. I'm falling for a shadow. I can't think of anything right now. I don't know what to do, my mind is set on you. I wonder should I call you? But I know what you would do. I'm going insane, you know i'd give you everything I got. I'm so tired, i'm feeling so upset :(

mcd.

This particular place, have a tiny spots in my heart. And I mean mcd taman pelangi indah, this place has witness so much of my time as an form 5 :) 

this is from just now, and I stole it from nana. Okay, I promise, the next time lepak mcd, I'll take a hefty sum of picture okay? :D

clap clap claaaap!

well, this is my 100th post, over this couple of months period of me having a blog! It's kinda numb feeling when I realize what has pass over the months. I mean, if you read my blog from the beginning, it'll state soo much of my experience over this year :) Okay, next one, this morning, I woke up at 0800 hours, and I waas freaking worry about my road law exam which is today! THANK GOD I PASS! Cause two of my mates beside me fail! I was turning blue, cause I din't read the book that much. Hey, at least in a couple months time, I CAN DRIVE EH. Okaay, anywaay. Now, I already cool down since my last post of me getting all mad. I guess, you guys, I mean especially nana of course, who keep asking me to proposeeee. NANAAAAAA, kalau aku naak, dah lamaaaaa dah aku buat =.= The thing is, i'm scared of the answeeer. What if its a NO? Surely I'll jump of a bridge or something. Okay no, maybe the tasik will do :P I wish, things would be like before.

REPLAY

It still kinda an eye opener for me. I mean, in a blink of an eye, im 17, and it almost feel like only yesterday I step my first step at Subang Utama. And my god, tomorrow is my road law exam. TIME FLIES QUICK. I've been searching for the button replay all this while. And i'm still searching :')

Yeah, I pretty owe you guys this one.

well, its not that I don't wanna tell you guys directly. I like to express it in a more, different approach. Here I goo, well to tell you the truth, its not that easy to forgetting you know who, but I din't mention you this, I already forget her, LOOONG AGO. WHEN I WAS SERIOUS ABOUT WANTING YOU. Of course its not easy, cause you don't know a single thing. And if there is SOME ASSHOLE that tell you anything, I guess that person is just trying to spoil everything, cause I want it to be SLOW. And you, I tell you what. I trust you with my life, and you seriously pissing me off. I can't believe you'll do this to me. You know what, your one BIG FUCKING ASSHOLE. I don't even know why I trust you last time. Cause now, YOU'RE JUST A WORTHLESS BIG PIECES OF CIBAI CRAP INSIDE ONE HUMAN BODY YOUUU FUCKING ASSHOLE. Okay, I think I had my moment, I mean a normal 'luahan emosi'. Sorry. Well, i'm currently not in the mood to even say anything. So bye. 

its a new month.

auf wiedersehen september :)

It's about time.

People often forget, what their purpose in life sometime. I mean, some people don't even know what they want in life, they just follow the lead, for example, study, get a job, get a family, and eventually, when the time is right, you die. While we humans busy doing all that, some of you maybe, feel that you probably should do something right now, but you don't know what it is! Maybe, some of you feels like you wanna be a superman, that can fly here and there, or maybe a nation leader or something like that. For me, I wanna be a ultraman, so that I can fight all the evil monster out there and fire them with beams from my arms across. Okay, this few lines uptop is just to waste you time. Well, the purpose of this post is, a reminder to all of you. That raya is about to end in a couple of day, and it officially ends on this saturday. We often think that we can't wait for another raya next year, and for me, raya next year wouldn't be the same. Think, by raya next year, i'm no longer a what we call a 'school' student. And by next ramadhan, there be no more iftar with my school mates. Maybe we all are gonna be scattered around malaysia, but for sure we ain't gonna see 'some' of each other. Why am I thinking that far out? I bet you, none of us here, can guarantee we even live till tomorrow. But come to think of it, its rather sad to think, this all gonna be over. Usually in december, I just can't wait to go to school, since i'm sick of this goddamn holiday, not matter how we hate learning, we still love the fact that we can see our friends, who we've known for three or five years, friends who've we trust and love, friends who we stand pround and tall too. Its sad, in the next 4 months, things will change drastically for me. My school days are gonna be over, and i'll be lossing some friends on the way. Maybe, the last day of spm, is the last day I get the chance to meet some of my friends, I mean, along this long way of life, we probably see each other in later life, but some, we will probably never gonna see again. It broke my heart to think of this. But, it's about time I realize, time is moving, and there's nothing in this world that can slow it down, nor stop it, but mind you, if we really use the time at best, we'll definitely enjoy every ounce of it :)

should I, should I not?

I don't know, seriously, while i'm typing all this down, i'm skyping with amirahwani, and she's playing the song from hady mirza-ku tetap kan menunggu. And my god, that song, seriously reminding me of her. Dammit, i'm a coward, i'm sorry. I don't mind, but I wish I was brave enough to tell you. That I WANT YOU, the thing is, I already know the answer, and i'm afraid, things will be different next time, how can I face you next time? You'll think of me differently next time. What should I do? I think, I should just tell you how I feel, that will of course get me at ease, but, what will be the impact of this action? Losing you of course. OH GOD, WHAT SHOULD I DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO? Maybe, nothing? I mean, zul affkarl even said, that I don't stand a chance, maybe, I genuinely don't have a fucking chance. Thank you for the advice zul, maybe now I really can took that cynide pill that i've been holding for some times. Hey, you guys should really listen to that song, and I mean that hady mirza song, the title is at uptop. Check it out, cause i'm doing that, and I mean i'll be waiting, no matter for how long. Oh, I dreamt about you last night, again. 

It's time.

this two days have been awesome! Let me talk about yesterday first! I wore my white padini shirt, my black crocodile pants, and my david beckam adidas shoes. I'm dress to kill to celebrate my birthday and adila's birthday at the same time! Abah send me around 1430 hours, well of course nana and shafiq dolah tumpang sekali. We arrived there just in time they all nak start makan! Anyway, after potong kek, and gila gila over there. Syafiq jaafar called a cab since three of us, consist of shafiq lah,syafiq jaafar, and I got not transport to izul's crib! Since yusry's ride is full with nana and hany's siblings. And even better, anip was there, he was driving a proton exora, and my god, eight girls tumpang diaaa seh! Anyway, masa sampai rumah izul, we had so much food intake, since he made a lamb grill, of course all of us went from full, to hungry in approximately 5 second. From izul's crib, we went to alia's crib, but thank god izul was kind enough to tag along, since he can drive, three of the the cabbies tag along with him! Oh, yeah and of course sri went there from his place :) Alia's crib was the last one, and we had a little problem there, were sri and hakim, finally confronted each other to settle some, 'business'. Anyway, after all that we go homeeee. Well, I wish I can tell you more, but since i'm freaking ngantuk, I'll probably sambung this later. CHERRIO.

Birthday :)

Today, was just beautiful. I wish, I could press replay :')

armpit and roses.

The title has clearly nothing to do with the content, I just can't think of a name. Since I haven't got a clue on what i'll be typing today eh? Why don't we just talk about what i've done so far today? Well, not much, like a normal teenager, I woke up around 1100 hours, then I swirl around for a minute in front of the tv, and head down for food. Since mama haven't got anything downstairs, I went back upstairs for a quick nap. Okay, this is boring, even I feel boring doing this. Oh, since tomorrow is my birthday, if any of my friends forgot to wish me, confirm aku cekik -_-'

Openhouse

this week, there's three open house. First and foremost, adila's crib to celebrate mine and her's birthday. Secondly alia's crib, then of course izzul :D I just can't wait for this saturday! Oh, by next week, I can take my road law exams, of course I kinda hesitate about driving, since I never had the chances to drive or any experience in driving, oh, does daytona counts? NEVERMIND. Hey, since my exam is officially over, WHY CAN"T WE WATCH JOHNY ENGLISH :(

woof woof.

woof woof? Yeaaaaah, that's got nothing to do with the content of the post. Well, today approximately around 1600 hours, izul came and fetch me, nana and hany and sent us to mcd. Since tomorrow is my seni paper, and I don't have a clue of what i'm gonna draw. Yeah, this is bullshit, anyway its more to lepak rather than studying, what to read nor drew since we all sucks at doing that! So, at mcd was me,nana,hany,yus,shafiq dol and ajib who came a little bit later, and the weird thing was, nadiah zaidi came masa we all dah nak balik. I din't even speak a word to her, maybe because, I felt bad because I forgot to invite her to mcd today.

 I felt like a basterd, I can't even look at your face just now because of the guilt build up inside of me just now. I'm soooo sooooo sooooooooooooo sorry NADIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH ZAAAAAAAAAAAAIDI. I DIN'T MEAN TO FORGET YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU. I just wanna hung myself right now. Its like I feel bad all inside me right now. God, was I thinking, rasa macam nak order air panas tadi and simbah kat my face ah seh. 

i wonder.

What should I say on this post? Er, well my birthday is coming, as in this saturday. What I want? A FREEEAAAAAAAKING NEEEEEEEEEW PHONEEEEEE. Oh and another thing, I know things are so far going nowhere, but you think im gonna give up? HELL NO. C'mon, I waited for the last girl for a year, of course I won't give up on this one so easily right? Okaaaaay, maybe you guys don't trust me on this one, but i'll prove it to you people out there. It's not easy okay, what? You think its like walking at the park? Life isn't a bed of roses, you need to face the music. You know, the girl with the multiple coloure bangle, she was my whole life, now that she's gone, it felt, different. Hm, what would I call this 'new' person eh? How about, JERAWAT? hahahaha! that's the name nana and I came up with. Well, before she was here, of course I feel different because I don't know how to pick up girls anymore since its been so long with the old one. But when she came to me, and when I start falling for her, I became restless. I know there's something different when I JUST CANT STOP THINKING OF HER. Okay, boring ah pula constantly cakap pasal dia, eh, birthday is coming, dah boleh ambik license! HELL YEAH.

Breath in.

the clock state 2345 hours, my stomach is bloated by the carcass I ate since morning, my lungs is full with the smoke from sheshaa I smoked from yesterday and today. My god, yesterday we had so much fun yesterday. We went karaoke, with mama's friend. MY GOD. I WANNA REWIND ALL THAT! Anyway, today I went to subang parade, dah tiga tahun kot tak gerak parade! DAH BERUBAH TAHAP EXTREME! Oh, there's another thing, I don't know about this girl, haihhhhh, take a long a deep breath haziq. I don't know if she even like me. Let me continue this some other time. Deal?

What a day.

well, its 0032 hours now, and at 0700 hours, we're heading to ampang hilir! Or we use the term, 'uncle shaarin' house! I love it there, hey, where else you could wake up in the morning, and as you look at the window, you'll see a white guy riding a horse. Since his house is near the Royal Selangor Polo Club, that's normal. At first, it scared the crap out of me, but since then, i'm getting used to it :) Oh, anyway, sunday ada wedding kat singapore, wonder what its like a malay wedding there, the last time I went to a wedding expo in singapore. IT WAS LIKE YOUR ENTERING A NEW DIFFERENT WORLD! SUMPAH.

I miss sheshaa.

puff puff, my 2 weeks holiday starts today. And I wanna do one thing, and one thing only, SHESHAAA LAAAAAAA VIDAAAAAAAAAAAA.

of course ah I miss sheshaa, last time I smoked it, when my brother got married, yep. On his wedding day, we ordered 20 something jars of sheshaa :D

its not that i don't want.

Its not that I don't want to confess to her already. I think I wanna do things slowly. But, truthfully, i'm kinda afraid, if she said no, i'm afraid of changes. I'm afraid everything will change, you, me, everything. Oh my, only god knows how much I waant you right now :) When its about you, I decided to give it my all. I'll go for broke, when the time is right, i'm gonna show you what I really felt about you.Oh my god! My own regret, is not seeing you infront of me this whole time :) I just can't get enough of youuuu! You're just to, too extraordinary, because there's no word in this world that I can relate it to you, you're just to special to be describe.

 I wish I had known you earlier, i'm afraid its to late for me to have you! But, seriously, I won't stop now. I'm gonna go for it. No matter what people say, no matter what people do, i'm gonna have you. *let just hope so* Seriously, its hard, to admit that i'm falling for you. But one day, when I looked at you, damn, I just can't help to notice, how I feel about you. I really really am falling for you. And its just pain and agony this minute pass without you bein' here :)

embarrass.

I came to nadiah zaidi's house, super early, and I was wearing a baju melayu. HOW GREAT. Oh, I din't get to eat any food. I was hungry. Like extreme hunger. But nevermind, at least it was fun :)

You want the truth?

This is for na, and syafiq, who kept asking me the same question. OVER AND OVER AGAIN. You guys love asking me, if nana 'kau suka dia ke tak?' or when syafiq dolah sometimes try to make fun of me by 'jealousy', and when I act dumb he would say 'kau ada feeling ke tak? Macam takda je?'. TRUTHFULLY, nana first, at first, it was just a maybe. But oh my god nana, when I hear her voice, dammit, my heart would melt. When she's near me, it really gave me butterfly! And when she smiled, god, that irresistible smile, who? I asked you who wouldn't fall for that? She's different, and I mean you can't find a person like that every day. She is truly one of a kind nana! All this while, I was confuse, and I felt guilty if I was using her as a tool to forget you know who. My god nana, I start realizing all this when I just can't stop thinking of her nowadays. When I said, its hard for me to love somebody, I really mean it! Its freaking hard for me to love anybody, and after I got fed up with the last girl you know who, I guess I forgot what it's like to chase the real thing. When I first got a glimpse of her, I din't feel anything, but when I said I want her, I REALLY REALLY REALLY want her, since it ain't easy for me to say that. I guess that is a sign from the universe to tell me that she's the one who I gotta be with. And now for syafiq dolah, all that jealousy act you said to me and do infront of me. You think I don't have any feeling towards that? You said I got NO feeling? MY GOD, ONLY GOD KNOWS WHAT I FEEL ON THE INSIDE. Your my friend, of course I wont show it to you, you jackass. I LOVE YOU MAN. And now, I just don't know what to do, as if my option is limited. And she's way out of my league. I don't know what I can do, I don't get the chance to interact with her sangat pun nowadays. ITS IMPOSSIBLE.
I can't do it, I can wait for sure. But for how long? Three years like the old one? I can't wait that long, I just CAN'T. Im afraid of the word 'rejection'. I feel if time is not by my side, then its a NO. If I can overcome that. Then its a YES. I WANT HER. OKAY I WAAAAAAAAAANT HER! :D

Rayaaaa.

Ahoy people, its been awhile. BECAUSE RAYA LA! Oh, anywaaaaaay, I never mention this before to anyone. When I was in form 3, during the aidilfitri sermon in Kedah. The imam mention this, 'kita semua seronok menyambut hari raya dan bulan puasa, tapi adakah kita pasti, yang kita dapat merasainya lagi pada tahun depan? Setahun kita tunggu untuk bulan mulia itu, tetapi ingatkah kita, bahawa bila bila masa sahaja allah boleh menjemput kita'. And trust me, I went numb, and straight away I took a big gulp!

ramadhan :)

don't go away ramadhan :) I had so much fun during this one month period. I get the chance to spend more time with my mates then ever :) Come to think of it, this is the last time I got the chance to spend my ramadhan in a school as a student. Holy moly, I don't want this to over! I wanna be a form 5 for the rest of my life.

 I wish I could stop time, and rewind everything all over again. I wanna feel that again, from the start. I wanna feel what it's like to be a darjah 1. And was afraid of the school, and see school as a place to have fun, and not 'belajar' :) 

Raya?

EM, yeah. Raya is coming. So what? Money coming also la ;D

Hand's Off.

yeaaaah, I forgot to tell you guys a tale. Anyway, couple's off week ago, or is it last week? Err, anywaaay, I got a chance to hold her hand, and her is referring to my 'ex' crush. And when I hold her hand, her warm hand, I rub my fingers to her palm.

 What make her so special? Everything, she's not a kind of girl that you meet everyday, she's like, ultimately one of a kind. I savor every last ounce of time to hold that hand. Damn, I miss having her as a crush! :) Anywaaaaaay, kakak shasha is back in town! 

Huaaargghhh.

PSK was tough, for example. 'APA MAKSUD MASYARAKAT'. WOAH :)

Can't take my eyes of you :)

Holy shit, It's hard for me to deny, I'm falling for you love! I can't bare to stand one day without seeing that smile of yours.

 I can't help it, you're just too good to be true, can't take my eyes of you :) There's nothing else to compare, the sight of you leaves me weak. There's no word left to speak :)

I guess, this is god's work.

I guess, i'm not the only one who feels this, kinda, aura of, I mean the feeling of, satisfaction and goodness during this ramadhan :) 

It's like, this month, nothing is going to be wrong, and its like a month of peace. Thank you allah :) Exam is coming, and sumpah, I am NOT READY. Sangat sangat tak ready la sia ;D

Week.

Woah, it's been a week already? I can't believe it! I mean, 3 more weeks to goo! Puasa sure feels good :)

 so yesterday, I had the shitiest buka ever. We bought a whole lot of stuff at Geylang, and when we came back, the food tasted, CRAPPY. Thank you god.

dammit!

Today, I take a step back, watch all the picture from what i've been through this 8 months of form 5 :) And trust me, its sad, I mean, I can't believe what i've seen along the way. This year, I had the privilege to go to Mallaca for the Wajadiri Silat Tournament.

And couple of months back, we had one awesome BBQ night! Where I had tons of fun, and tiring activity!

Another one thing I had this year is IRDA :) They spent money for younger generation to love Johor, work with the flow and together we can bring johor to its glory day :) 

And this year, well, this is the last year i'm gonna spend my time as a school student. Come to think of it, you can marry and remarry, you can have kids and continue having kids, you can study in university and college multiples of time, but being a school students, is only a once in a lifetime opportunity :) So..

 to anyone who i've seen all this year to make 'this' happen :) I have met the awesomess people along the road, and met even NEW people! I just hope that, insyallah, by all means, we'll see each other again, even if we din't know it! :)

ADDMATH.

Been busy, doing addmath folio, okay its easy, just copy the answer straight away from internet ;)

DAYS OF GLORY.

The title has nothing to do with my day, its just plain tiring.

  I can't believe what I did today, I mean, in IRDA sort of way. I'm in a massive headache, I can't barely see the screen, since my head is spinning as I'm writing this down. Guys, there's something I wanna talk about, and I never kept any secret from you blog! :P Why am I talking to this blog? I guess, I treat this blog like a living person, and like someone to spill my heart too, even though the content is available for the public to read -_-' There's someone new, and seriously, when we first met, I had no idea you would be so important to me :)

Kiss me, kiss me a lot :)

 If you guys love classical music like me, then you'll probably recognize this sentences from Andrea Bocelli song, besame mucho :) I actually memorize the song even though its in spanish :) I love him so much, I mean, as if he's got a voice of an angel ;) OH, and another thing, today was tiring, at approximately 0900 hours, we went to the Bukit Aliff muslim cemetery site for the big clean up program held by the local UMNO there, and even though it was tiring, it feels good that we can work together as fellow muslim and malay, this is good way to connect with people :) And after that, we went to the Pelangi Indah Hall for this..

guess who's inside the car. MEEE :) its a crime awareness program, so you know why this car is here ;)

Game Over.

Today, I had the pleasure of studying together with my mates. That is Shafiq Lah, Yusry, Hani, and 'the' Nadiah zaidi. Anyway, we had tons of pleasure just now. It was more to playing then studying. While doing all that, I don't know why, in a blink of an eye, I said to myself, Im fucking over her! :) YES! You know who! WHY? Don't ask me. I guess, all I need is, fun, and I mean FUN. TONS OF IT! Okay, next topic, last wednesday, I've finally watch the last of the Harry Potter trilogy! I din't see the first part, so I was super blur when it came to the 2nd part. But it was alright, since I got Nadiah beside me explaining from A to Z. I can't believe she cried watching that movie, when snape died, yep, she was CRYING. And I was like, what the...., you know the 'what the..' moment right! :D Im super tired right now, at school today, Din had a fight with Mr. Tan! And it was brutal. Syafiq, fikri and I ran from the art room to the discipline room, and we've manage to hold grip of him before he can do anything like hitting that teacher. Truthfully, I was kinda mad with Mr.Tan, cause he knows that Din was mad at him, still he wanna provoke him with words and action. Shish, thank god Mr.Syahir was there to take him away. Damn, I notice something, my post is getting shorter and shorter. Well, what to do, i'm running out of crazy idea :)

moving.

Abah said, we're most probably, moving. Too, maybe singapore, he already even searched for my law school, and my sis replacement school. Truthfully, I dont wanna leave here. Cause.. Hm.. I don't wanna be apart from my friends, and for god sake, this is home. The one thing I can confirm is, we're moving. Fullstop.

Over the weekend.

Well, this one week, so manyyy things happen at once, for starter, I was scolded like gila babi by Ms Oi Lee Lee at tuesday for not finishing her art folio, and trust me, she was not happy one bit. She even got the pengetua involved during that time, but I dont blame her, I mean, if I finish the job earlier, kan senang. Actually, the day before that, I already try to finish in one day in hany's crib. But sumpah, then only I realized when I saw nana punya folio, that im way way way far from done! But we had some good time there, nadiah was there, and trust me, we had so much fun messing with her. I don't know why, but when she's focus on one thing, then nothing else matter in her world, for example at that time, she was focusing on her twitter, then I called her, I said, 'nadiah.. nadiaah?.. NADIAAAAAAAAH!..NADIAAAAAAAH ZAAAAAAAIDIIIIIIII!! ...allah..HAAAAALLLLFFF MAAAN HAAAALLLFFF STEEEELLLL..., NEVERMIND'. Okay, skip that one! Next week, we planned to watch happy popper! I kinda okay with that, since I never fancy watching harry do magic, its kinda.. KIDDY. You get me? NEVERMIND. Ohh! And also, that same day i kena scold with ms Oi, I went to the 2nd session of my IRDA, and it was mindblowwing. But I had a one in a lifetime experience there when we were treated by the guards, let me talk about it in the next post okay? CHERRIO.

fagots and gay.

okay, the title of this particular post has nothing to do with the content okay :) as im typing this down, nana baker is eating her nuggets sexily, and hany alia is being good mother to us ;) Okay, we're inside hany's house doing our art folio. And trust me, we're going nowhere, eheee. There were supposed to be at least 5 of us, but of course, this is what happen when you made a plan with the fellow ladies, we man gotta eat the pain. Anyway, cherrio ;)

BERSIH? MORE LIKE KOTOR.

I don't care what do you guys think, or what you guys got on your mind. But seriously, to anyone who is joining the 9th of July rally,

then seriously, I think you guys have porridge instead of brain. Are they stupid? I think any malaysian that have brains would not be there. C'mon ah, even though i'm only seventeen, but I guess I and a few of malaysian has the thing to think rationally on this case. Jangan jadi bodoh okay? In my opinion, I don't mind the BERSIH people are having this rally, but think outside the box, surely there is gonna be a group of people who is gonna start a chaos and cause violent to occurs later. From a peaceful demonstration, there would be a massacre. If the army open fire like in Bangkok,

I would clap, and laugh looking at these stupid people who join this goddamn rally. Next topic, the american army. You notice something? Everytime there's a war going on this world, there's always these goddamn american army. They love to interrupt and join a different war for sure. In other word, for example, the american army is in Iraq, in Afganistan, Libya, and now is helping the philipine army to fight the chinese communist army, who I salute. See? These americans are gonna do the same mistake like my idol, the nazi army. TOO MANY FRONTS YOU GOTTA COVER. Please, stop the interruption.

Mr. Ang

There was once a great man, who teaches math in a local school in Subang. This guy, who everyone fears if his silver colour toyota unser drive by, because we love to play basketball near the carpark area without permission, so he'll honk three times indicating he's there! When he teaches, you better do your work and shut the hell up. Cause he will just look straight at your face if you talk in his class. I once scold by him, cause he caught me copying the answer at the back of the text book, which I really did. Mr Ang was the head discipline teacher that time. So everyone was scared of him, but if you really know him, I mean, if he's like, teach you and stuff, you gotta a feeling of love for him. He's extremely funny, and trust me, when I left Subang Utama, I miss him. A WHOLE LOT. The thing is, its been three years since I heard from him. And now, I recently find out that, he is suffering from stage 4 cancer. That news shocked the hell out of me. Sumpah Tersentap. I can't imagine, this guy who at the last day of my school in Subang Utama advice me to be somebody, is not fighting for his life. I pray everyday, for him to get better. Mr Ang, I'm a bad student, I should go and see you if I got time. I miss you sir :(

I'm Glad :)

I'm glad hari terbuka is oveerrrrr :) But come to think of it, this particular day, I mean this hari terbuka, would be my laaaast hari terbukaaaaaa :( For 11 years, hari terbuka was apart of me! Now its over! Good thing Madam Sabariah back me up just now. If not, hmm, Im dead. Seriously, OKAY! Next topic, MAHARAJA LAWAK IS OVEERRRR. Without maharaja lawak, my life is worthless. Just imagine, last time, friday is the day that we all looking forward to cause of this programme, now, WE'RE DEAD. 

Okay, now whaaat did you said!??

Well, today in school, i've got burned! In other word, we had our yearly fire drill. And trust me, its was crap. I mean, imagine a real fire broke out in school, example, at my last in school in Subang Utama, a real fire broke out in the sports utility room, and trust me, no one turned on the fire alarm, and everyone freak out. This is an actual picture of my school at that time..

OKAY IM JOKING! Anywaaay, back to my school fire drill, so at that time, Nadiah, i mean 'THE' nadiah zaidi, said that, my blog is 'too' mushyyy'. Truthfully, I kinda feel the same waaaay, so, in this particular post, i'm gonna do something out of the ordinary, and something I never done before in my life, that is, sing while typing all this done, swear to god im singing right now, and lucky me, you guys ain't gonna hear it. TEEHEE! Okay, if nadiah or maybe nana is reading this right now, you guys probably said something like, 'this is boring'. So in order to satisfy you're will, HERE WE GO.

I think the gay picture on the middle gonna leave a mark on you guys ;) I guess, what I can do now is, wait until monday, because for sure you guys gonna punch me because of this one particular post ;)

What did you said?

Well, Nana Baker once said, when she looked at my blog, all the can see is words words and more words, so in order to satisfy people like her, i'll give her a lot of pictures to satisfy her wills ;)

 yeah.

A friend in need, is a friend indeed.

In this world, there's nothing is more stronger than the power of friendship. I've heard a lot of times, from people around me saying that, they rather have friends rather girlfriend or boyfriend, in other words, they enjoy more when they with they're friends. I kinda disagree with this one, I mean, there's a fine line between what a friend can give you, and what a girlfriend can give you. With friends, you can always rely on them to cheer you up and always have a good time with them even though things are not that great, because when you're with your buddies, everything is like, more lightnen up and ect. But, when you are with someone you love so deeply, things are very very different. For me, when I saw my girl last time, i've always said to myself, I would rather have her than anything else in this world. When I hold her hand, damn, her warm hand, I just know, that i'm in cloud nine. When you look into her eyes, those mesmerizing eyes, you know, with friends, you can't have that. In conclusion, you gotta have friends and someone particular that you love at the same time, and a balance of both world. Okay? Now, different topic, what do I miss the most in this world? That's easy, someone to love. I miss the feeling, of having someone to miss, someone to look after, and someone that I know, there's nothing in this world, that you want rather than her. I miss the moment when you can look into her eyes, and see one of the most beautiful thing in this world. When you hug someone, trust me, there's a feeling of flying into the clouds! I mean, when you hold her, its like, you know in your heart, this person is the you love, and you'll do anything just to keep it that way :) ahh, I miss all of that. TRUST ME. If I have one, i'll treat her with maximum care just like i've used too. I promise one thing, and one thing only, that is, love :)

Finally :)

Finally, with the help from this people right here :-

                                                      Ronis :)

 

Khateejah :)

 Adila :)

 amelia :)

hani :)

 aghnia :)

sabiha :) 

i've manage to go out from this house, and enjoy a good movie and have a pleasant evening with them. Even though we've overspend the money on the food section, where we have to pay 147 dollars for a nice meal. It was all worth it. And the part when I was hit countless time and mercifully from egg-nia, was alright! So guys,

I LOVE YOU GUYS OKAY :)